June 9th, 2025
The internet has done a really good job of making us feel really bad about the state of society and I’m going to try to simplify why while offering, I hope, a little sip of hope.
There is one undeniable fact about any comment section on any social media page:
It lowers the bar for humanity.
It does so, I believe, in two distinct ways:
- Externally: the quality and condition of human beings who self-select to participate in comment sections is questionable at best and affects how we view humanity.
- Internally: how people act on the internet sets the stage for how we approach and interact with people on the internet and, more generally, other humans of the world.
I think a lot of us make the fallacy of believing how people comment on the internet is indicative of how the whole of humanity thinks, feels, and acts in reality.
This simply isn’t the case.
And I want to refer you back to my earlier use of the phrase “self-select.”
“People” do not make themselves heard on the internet; the particular and peculiar kind of people who want to be heard on the internet make themselves heard on the internet.
Do you hear what I’m saying?
A comment section does not give you a balanced view of humanity’s perspective on any person, situation, or topic; it gives you the view of what vocal people online think of a person, situation, or topic, and that is actually a very small percentage of humans on this planet.
More broadly: the internet is not the real world.
Yes: the internet can affect change. It can affect words, thoughts, and action in the real world.
But it’s not reality in itself.
And I think being ignorant (or forgetful) of that objective truth has led a lot of us to have a pretty fucking miserable view of the people who live on this earth with us.
The solution is an obvious and healing one: talk to the people around you and, if you can’t stop reading the comments, at least be smart about what a comment section is.
It does not represent truth. It does not represent a sensible proportion of the population.
It only contains the specific kind of people who want and choose to be part of that kind of conversation in a very public kind of way.
They want you to think that their views are widespread or common or even popular.
They want you to think that hate is the default and the only type of important talk is shit.
They get off by making you feel alone, because that is how they feel, and so deeply.
Don’t let them. Get to know your neighbors. You will not love them all. You were never meant to. But you will see their value and their values, and you will be frequently, pleasantly surprised by how good so many of us truly are.
The Den 