“The Most Boringest Ride Ever”

The happiest place on Earth.

June 24th, 2019

“I do not want to go on the most boringest ride ever.”

My dad didn’t let me live this one down for a while.

We were at Disney World, which, in my young heart, was the most perfect place a person could imagine. Heaven was a distant and possibly fictional second. I had always wanted to be an animator and a writer and I was obsessed with everything Disney (and am, to a much more controlled extent, still today). There were so many things I wanted to do, and so little time, and my dad stood right in the way of that:

“I want to take you on the studio tour.” It was a slow-moving train that traveled behind-the-scenes of the park, and normally I would have been really excited but there were just SO MANY OTHER THINGS I REALLY WANTED TO DO. I said no. My dad insisted.

I bitched and moaned the entire time in line, and even though my parents are deaf, it spared them little. I was adamant that I did not want to go on “the most boringest ride ever” (my words, because I was as dumb a kid as I am an adult).

We finally got on and I was SO RIGHT. IT WAS SO BORING. IT WAS — wait, something was happening. We were brought to an area that was allegedly an old part of an Indiana Jones set. It had been inactive for a long time when all of a sudden boulders started rolling from the sky, with high waves and hot flames and I legitimately thought I was going to die. And my parents, those lovely, kindly folks, knew to take this photo at this exact time.

I was wrong. It was not the most boringest ride ever. It ended up being one of our favorite stories from the trip, and like I said, not one I lived down any time soon.

So don’t assume. Don’t assume today is going to be lame or dumb or boring. Because a lot of life feels like a backlot tour, and you never know when you’re going to find the adventure of your life during it.

Published by dennisvogen

I'm me, of course. Or am I?

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