June 3rd, 2020
Every single morning, especially since I’ve been sober, I wake up and I prepare myself to be called out.
What will it be today? I don’t know. Yesterday, it was because I used the wrong hashtag; it was an honest mistake, and I fixed it immediately.
Some of you may understand. Some of you may wonder why I start my day already telling myself I will do something wrong.
It’s because I will.
I put myself in that charged space so when it inevitably arises, I’m not taken off guard. I’m hopefully not irrationally defensive. I’m ready to listen.
Am I always wrong? Objectively, no. Am I always right? An even bigger no.
I could get called out on any or every single thing, and I try to tell myself that it’s a positive interaction. Because it either allows me to further elaborate on what I feel or think or believe, or it allows me to learn something new that I didn’t know before.
These are both good outcomes.
I have a few decades of life behind me, and in them I have all the grays, from tints to shades. There are things I’ve done that I am really proud of, and some that were absolutely terrible of me. I wouldn’t take any of them back, in that I’ve learned from every single one.
And I’ll continue to learn from every single one.
If there’s one simple thing being called for right now, it’s listening. None of us will get it right every time, but that’s not an excuse to continue getting so much wrong. This is a process, and it moves as quickly as we cooperate; isn’t that what everyone is asking for to some degree? Cooperation?
If you don’t wake up every day thinking you deserve to be called out for something, why do you think that is?
Because it couldn’t be that you are perfect.
And admitting that is a very good first step.