April 24th, 2021
I finished watching After Life tonight (which I had talked a little about yesterday). It’s a simple joy when, instead of learning a new lesson from something, it just reaffirms a belief you’ve known all along.
One of the things that Tony learns is that sharing the life of someone he had loved and lost is the surest way of making certain they live on.
I knew from the day she passed that all I wanted to do was write and talk about how wonderful my mom was for as long as I can, because I knew that her love and wonder was something that could make a person’s day today, no matter where she happens to be.
Finding wisdom in the opposite of lessons is worthwhile, too.
Tony tells another character not to wallow, because wallowing is easy. You can find yourself addicted to grief and only finding comfort in the sad, ungrateful and uncomfortable.
You can also find yourself lost in ignoring that grief by any and all means, in being busy and imitating what others know as you being okay. That’s what I’ve been doing, and I think I need to learn how not to wallow, but to be able to tread in it, to let myself feel it around me.
To watch a show which has the singular purpose of dealing with the idea of being okay and what okay means to anyone anyway has been a nice way to dip my toe in.
Anyway, I hope you’re hanging in there, claws and talons and all. Give the person (or animal) next to you a hug. And don’t turn down an opportunity to dance when you find yourself presented with one.
The Den 