February 15th, 2023 I often have to repeat to myself that the world isn’t more tragic; we are just made more aware of all the tragedies. And tragedy becomes a kind of string we wear around our finger. I have extended family who are going through a personal tragedy right now, losing their father, myContinue reading “String Theory”
Tag Archives: Depression
All the Wrong and Dark Things
January 31st, 2023 Today is the last day of Origins month, and I sincerely want to thank anybody who’s been reading. A better explanation of why I’m doing this (and why I do anything on the internet at all) is coming tomorrow, the first day of a new month, and a new topic. Going throughContinue reading “All the Wrong and Dark Things”
The Language of Darkness
November 25th, 2022 There’s something you feel when someone ends their own life that feels either unnatural or completely understandable. It’s something I’ve explored a lot, in essays like these, and in fictional characters like Liam, in the book Push, and Axis in The Weirdos. I had the realization that I had said unnatural orContinue reading “The Language of Darkness”
I’m Becoming This
November 7th, 2022 “I don’t know if I’m strong; I think I’m just numb.” – Khloe Kardashian Today — and this week, and this year, and the past handful of years — I wonder how many of us have been embodying this Khloe Kardashian quote. I don’t know the difference between strong and numb someContinue reading “I’m Becoming This”
Could I BE More Grateful?
October 28th, 2022 Like the handful of other Americans who still sit down to watch broadcast TV live in the evening, we watched the Matthew Perry interview with Diane Sawyer tonight. I don’t think I can properly express my gratitude for him or my feelings over what he spoke about. It was mostly about addiction,Continue reading “Could I BE More Grateful?”
Just Another Day
October 16th, 2022 It’s just another day. It’s football day. My dread is warmer than usual, my anxiety sharper. It’s not just another day. My dad legally divorced the Minnesota Vikings in 1998 over an incident neither he nor millions of other sports fans had any control over. My mom stayed committed to them. ThatContinue reading “Just Another Day”
Groundless
October 14th, 2022 I was going to write about fall today. I had a lot of feelings yesterday and thought of some words I was going to write this morning. I was going to take a stunning photo of an autumn tree. And then it snowed. And what I really wanted to talk about cameContinue reading “Groundless”
I Am Not An Illusion
August 24th, 2022 Mystery is an amateur magic show. I get frequently asked why I tell people stuff on the internet. Like, the stuff you shouldn’t really tell people, the stuff people don’t talk about like I think they should, the stuff that is heavy or hard. I do it because I feel like weContinue reading “I Am Not An Illusion”
Not Too Little, Never Too Late
August 19th, 2022 When people get comfortable around me and my sobriety, they start to ask more complicated questions about it. The one they inevitably get to is: “Do you miss anything about drinking?” I do. Of course I do. Too much for a single post. But I want to talk about something that mightContinue reading “Not Too Little, Never Too Late”
In Dreams: The Sandman, Flip, and Push
August 8th, 2022 I finished the first season of The Sandman on Netflix this afternoon. As a massive Sandman fan, for years, I personally think it is a better-than-perfect adaptation of the source material. I also want to add how well the series is cast; Tom Sturridge as Dream is the single best casting choiceContinue reading “In Dreams: The Sandman, Flip, and Push”
The Den 