Everywhere You Look

July 20th, 2021 It’s been brought to my attention by multiple people over the last few weeks that I have been talking about Full House a lot, and watching it with curious regularity. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t begin questioning why I’ve been doing this. With the 90’s being the latest era toContinue reading “Everywhere You Look”

Your Own Damn Path

June 2nd, 2021 Evolution is determined by those who act, and the same who act also determine our history and our future. It’s not abnormal for me to get ahead of myself, so let me start over. Let’s say you’re a cave-person, and you find yourself faced with a sabertooth tiger. If you decide toContinue reading “Your Own Damn Path”

Announcement: Push

May 29th, 2021 Ope. I guess I had another story to tell. We’ll obviously talk a whole lot more about this, the sequel to Flip, as it gets closer. But I have to say: Push is dark. Maybe the darkest thing I’ve ever written. And yet, if I do my job right, my goal isContinue reading “Announcement: Push”

Why of the Tiger

May 24th, 2021 I find that using metaphor is helpful in explaining behavior or situations or phenomena in a way that encourages the person reading it to be less defensive and feel not attacked. So let’s talk about tiger trainers. First things first: being a tiger trainer is one of the dumbest careers in theContinue reading “Why of the Tiger”

Truth Serum

May 12th, 2021 There was a phrase I used to hear all the time when I was drinking that would put fear in me more than anything else anyone could say. “The truth comes out when you’re drunk.” This was repeated so often that it was no longer anecdotal for me, an absolute, objective truthContinue reading “Truth Serum”

Famous Last Blurbs

March 15th, 2021 This is going to be the last substantial post I make for a while, because this is the last post that’s going to make it in the book. It’s weird because some of you will read these words on a screen and some of you will read them on paper, and thisContinue reading “Famous Last Blurbs”

Two Become One

March 5th, 2021 What if you’re not really a person? What if you’re actually just two concepts? Two ideas with frequently oppositional magnetic poles. Imagine two circles. I label one “Your Ideal Self,” and the other “Your Actual Self.” Now imagine that from birth to death, all you do is push and pull these twoContinue reading “Two Become One”

Apples to WAP

March 4th, 2021 A teacher is explaining to her young student how to properly compare things in order to increase understanding. “What is WAP?” she asks the child. “WAP is an explicit hip-hop song whose target demographic is a mature, adult audience who appreciates both the genre and the subject matter,” the young man repilies.Continue reading “Apples to WAP”

Po-Tay-Toh, Po-Tah-Toh

March 2nd, 2021 *Sigh* The best thing we can do is learn something, right? Generally, on the internet, the people I hear complain about something the loudest are the exact same people who say everyone else complains too much and are too easily offended. The Potato Head Scandal is the closest to actual satire ofContinue reading “Po-Tay-Toh, Po-Tah-Toh”

The Enemy of my Enemy is Me

February 1st, 2021 “To fight the empire is to be infected by its derangement . . . Whoever defeats part of the empire becomes the empire; it proliferates like a virus . . . Thereby it becomes its enemies.” – Phillip K. Dick I didn’t know how it phrase it as eloquently as Dick, butContinue reading “The Enemy of my Enemy is Me”