Skol Post

October 10th, 2021

Today’s win was amazing. Not because it got us into the playoffs, or gave us a championship, but because it reminded us of the one of the best traits inherent in humanity.

Hope.

We get let down a lot. Most of us have unrealistic expectations. Only the greatest of us have no expectations at all.

It isn’t the worst trait to want the best possible outcome, but we can let it turn into an ugly one when we lose. It becomes even uglier when we express our disappointment or disgust over any thing or person that we have no right to or over. That goes beyond any sports team or book series or film franchise.

Most of the people and stuff we love will let us down. I know I’ve let people down. Terribly. I let myself down. Often. (This photo would be adorable if I would have known how many beers was enough at the time, that number for me being zero.)

But when it happens — the miracle, the win, the best possible outcome — in a world that conditions us to prepare for the worst and to protect our hearts from breakage, it is not only an exhilarating and life-affirming moment, but it reminds us why humanity is so special and so stupid in our willingness to believe.

In absolutely anything. Especially each other.

So, the W is great. I’ll take it any day. But the moment we shared? It’s priceless. Like our basic humanity itself.

Them + Us: Special Edition

October 9th, 2021

On April 1st, 2013, I released my first book, Them. It’s a violent, funny, absolutely absurd story featuring mysterious aliens, deeply flawed humans, and buckets of vomit and blood (and a shot of excrement).

Exactly a year later, I returned with Us, the second half of the traumatizing tale.

In 2021, I revisit the series with a razor-like clarity and vengeance.

Say hello to Them + Us: Special Edition.

Not that I need them, but I have multiple reasons for wanting to do this version of the story.

– I wanted to put both novellas back into print and into the same book. The initial print runs for both Them and Us were extremely small and have been sold out for years. They are also the last of my books I released through BookBaby (which is a great company to work with); like Taylor Swift, by releasing this version, I gain complete control over my work, as opposed to having a middle group between us.

– I wanted to take the same Special Edition approach I did with Flip, being able to see the story with fresh, confident eyes, and able to edit for clarity and enhance the text and structure without changing the plot.

– Speaking of the story: this was not only ahead of its time, but ahead of me at the time. I’ve been thinking about how much I love these novellas and their themes and, especially in recent years, I’ve been able to identify what it was trying to say all along. All the characters are gray, including the main character, whose complexity suggests there may be no real “good guys” or “bad guys” at all.

This is one of two announcements I have for the rest of this year. If you weren’t able to check this work out in the beginning, you’re able to pick it up now, better than it ever was. It honestly is audacious and outrageous and it’s the work of a young punk who was just working out the chords. It’s loud and unapologetic. I hope you dig it.

Out soon. All my love.

float on

October 8th, 2021

It’s spooky season, so it’s finally appropriate that everything feels so ephemeral to me.

Sometimes loss feels like weight, but lately it has felt like nothing at all, smoke that used to be wood that you realize you never could have actually carried forever.

That scares me. When I was young, I felt a permanence to life. People and things lasted for a long time. But as my time here gets longer, and my perspective wider, I see how quickly you and I are here and then we’re not.

More loss solidifies this fog I’m in.

But before you think this is some deep abyss I’m chasing or falling through, it’s not. There is permanence here. It’s in the moment. There are people and things in front of you, that are here, now.

You can hold on to them forever, whatever forever means to you.

I used to dream about what it was, until the dream itself became forever. I don’t know what time it is there or how it passes. I can see whoever and do whatever I want. A dream makes me feel real feelings, making the dream as real as anything else.

I guess I’m just trying to find the permanence in the water that won’t stop running and the air that won’t stop moving; accepting that everything changes, but that doesn’t make what existed before meaningless.

If you’re feeling weight today, I feel for you. If you feel weightless today but no less anxious or worried, I am floating right alongside you.

Softer Ways

October 7th, 2020

It’s rough out there.

I just wanted to share some affirmations with you that help me when I remember to stop, take a breath, and think about them.

Which I wish I did more, but it’s really rough out there, and I’m spreading myself as thin as I can, trying to keep me so busy this month that I forget that this month is this month.

The affirmations go kind of like this:

Just because someone is louder than you, it doesn’t mean they’re right.

Just because someone has stronger convictions than you, it doesn’t mean they’re right.

Just because someone believes in something more than you, it doesn’t mean they’re right.

Just because someone says they’re smarter than you, it doesn’t mean they’re right.

And just because someone is in a group that outnumbers you, it doesn’t mean they’re right.

I can tell you what makes a person wrong, though.

Anyone who generalizes any group of people is wrong.

Anyone who can’t recognize cognitive dissonance or hypocrisy is wrong.

Anyone who forces someone to follow any set of beliefs, especially the kind that are impossible to prove, is wrong.

Anyone who is mean or cruel is wrong.

Anyone who says they have never been wrong is wrong.

It’s rough out there, and I have to remind myself of words like this because if I don’t, I’ll spiral, too. I’ll start to generalize. I’ll be hypocritical. I’ll try to force someone to see things my way. I’ll be mean. I’ll be cruel. I’ll be wrong.

And I don’t have it in me to be that way anymore. I’m tired.

I want to be kind, and I want to be fun, and I want to talk about things we like, and I want to be of service to people.

I really, really do.

I hope these words can be of some service to you.

Brushfire Contest Announcement + A Nut-Ton of Updates!

October 6th, 2021

Hi, friends! How you doing today? I have quite a few things to address so I’ll get right to it.

Brushfire Contest End Date

I’ve decided to run the Brushfire Fan Art Contest until… December 31st, 2021. Meaning you have until the end of the year to get your submissions in!

Don’t know what I’m talking about? A month or so ago, I announced that I was taking in Brushfire fan art from kids (and kids of all ages) to potentially print in the back pages of the first graphic novel, just like my favorite childhood comics did when I was growing up.

You can find character sheets for Brushfire on dennisvogen dot com or my previous contest post; when you’re done with your work, you can submit it over direct message or send it to thenextstepislast@yahoo.com.

I’ve already received some amazing art and you have the rest of 2021 to finish yours! I’ll choose which to print based on my favorites and space available, and those whose work is published will receive one free copy of Brushfire: Wave 1.

This also means that Brushfire: Wave 1 will be officially released in 2022.

More Announcements

…But that doesn’t mean I’m done with 2021. There will be two more announcements by the end of this month, and hopefully they’re as exciting for you as they’ve been for me.

I also have some merchandise updates:

– MN Nice mugs are no longer available online. I sold a highly unexpected amount over the last two weeks (to the woman who bought one at Twin Cities Con and then came back for three more — you’re a legend), so inventory is low and they’ll be first-come, first-serve at upcoming events until they’re gone. There are no current plans to restock.

– Individual black & white issues of all Weirdos comic books are no longer available online. Each got a limited print run, and they will never be printed by me (or certain local printers…) in that format again. These, too, will be first-come, first-serve at events until they’re sold out. A few issues are still on the stands at local comic shops, so be on the look-out there, too.

– Signed copies of my work are available only at events and through my website; I can’t sign something you order off Amazon before they send it to you, but I am more than happy to sign anything you bring to an event. I will not charge you for a signature. That’s just silly.

– I’m available for all your comments, concerns, complaints, or praise about my work. I like knowing what I can do better and what I’m doing well. We can disagree and still get a lot out of a conversation. We have so much to learn and so much we can teach each other.

And with that, I hope you’re doing well, or at the very least hanging in there.

I’m looking forward to these last few months of yet another strange year.

Twin Cities Con Report 2021

October 3rd, 2021

Get your splatterguard for this post because a lot of heart and guts are heading your way.

First and foremost: the warmest and fuzziest hugs to the organizers and volunteers of Twin Cities Con. It’s no secret that our community was cautious of a new convention coming to town; in a way, though, our wary, low-to-reasonable expectations led to a far-better-than-anticipated weekend, and nearly everyone I talked to was positively glowing, feeding a nerd hunger that’s been gnawing on us collectively for over 18 months now.

It was a fantastic first outing.

If you’re new here: welcome. I’m so glad you found me.

My notes from the con:

– I personally had my best one-day sales ever on Saturday, since I started tabling in 2018. That led to my best weekend ever, and that was due to an amazing convention crowd and a large selection of my work being (finally!) available.

– Speaking of: this was the first week I’ve been able to talk to people about The Weirdos: Volume 1, a graphic novel that came out in May 2020. It was a little out-of-body to be doing what I’ve been dreaming about doing for 16 months, and introducing something that was totally new for so many folks. The reception to the ideas was incredible; I found new ways to describe this work, the characters to whom I gave my defects, and I realized I’m never really going to make something like this again. My table got regularly emotional, raw, and I think the work is raw and emotional in a way I could never replicate. I hope you all like it, and I’m here to talk about it when you’re done.

– I got so much dog dad pride with the love Theia got over the weekend, both the story itself and the cover girl, who was based on my baby, Marvel. Got to see lots of photos of dogs, hear lots of stories about dogs, and any time with dogs is time well spent.

– I love how more people are finding Flip, but to be honest, I’m more excited that people have Push, because I think it’s a story that needs to be read and I’m really proud of it.

– Who would have thought packaging all the things that are wrong with me as art was going to be emotionally exhausting?! I got to introduce my many flaws to thousands of people in person and what a trip. Thank you all for accepting me, anyway. You are far too kind. And I am completely, utterly wiped, a hard drive under a magnet.

I met (and reunited with) some of the best people this weekend, and if we connected, I could never tell you how I grateful I am.

If you’re wondering, I’m a confirmed guest for Twin Cities Con 2022. I’ll also be in Rochester in three weeks for NerdinOut Con 2021. See you soon.

And, as always: all my love.

Pre-Show Jitters

October 1st, 2021

Tomorrow is the first day of Twin Cities Con. And I’m anxious.

I wrote about anxiety earlier this week, and I thought I’d follow those thoughts up with these feelings I’m having while I’m in the moment.

Every single time an event like this comes along, I’m filled like an over-stuffed donut with a jelly of every emotion. It’s like the first day of school, a brand new job and a family reunion all smushed together. Sure, there’s anticipation and excitement here, but also a sometimes overwhelming feeling of dread fueled by my own unreasonable expectations for myself.

I always want to be friendly and entertaining and inclusive and, like walking a tightrope, I am terrified of slipping and falling from those personal goalposts.

I’m always flattered when someone says I’m a “natural” at any of this, that I am clearly in my element during these days, but that’s simply not true. I had to learn a lot of this, and I’m still learning so much each time.

I don’t think “extrovert” and “introvert” are accurate concrete phrases to describe any individual. I think we’re all a combination of both extroverted and introverted features, and there are days we can’t choose which ones will take the lead.

All I know is I love creating and I love people and I love talking about stuff I love. I put my faith in that — the fact that I really do care too much about everything — and cross my fingers, close my eyes, and try to remember to breathe.

It helps.

If you’re anxious about tomorrow, no matter what it is you’re doing, you’re not alone. I hope you’re able to remember what you bring to the table, to the building, to the world, and that it’s enough to pull you through the proverbial fire.

Something > Nothing

September 28th, 2021

Someone close to me shared a video of a TED Talk about anxiety yesterday morning. I am nothing if not consistently anxious; if anxiety were an electrical current, I am always at a level where you would receive a static shock if you tapped on my shoulder.

Beyond describing the different forms and severities of anxiety, the speaker detailed ways to deal with it. One of the phrases she used has been a motto of mine since I independently discovered it when I was a kid:

“Anything worth doing is worth doing badly.” — G. K. Chesterton

It’s a widely-shared quote, and it is an essential tool in dealing with things like anxiety, perfectionism, and Imposter Syndrome, which I more than dabble in daily. I would confess to being a professional in those fields.

I’ve written about this before, but that quote goes hand-in-hand with my perspective that my worst book is better than your best idea and that is an objective fact, simply because one exists in our shared reality and one does not. (This is despite what reviews say, because there are reviews out there that perhaps some of my words should have just stayed in my head.)

When people ask me how they can become a writer, I tell them to write, and I don’t ever mean that in a flippant or condescending way. I mean it as the single most important thing you can do, and not just as a writer.

Because “write” could mean anything. “Write” could mean “make your bed.” “Write” could mean “take a shower.” “Write” could mean “say something nice to someone today.” “Write” could mean “go outside and pet a dog.” “Write” could mean “find or give happiness in some small way.”

“Write” means “do something.”

And when I tell someone to write, even if they don’t feel like it, even if what they’re writing isn’t very good, what I’m telling them is:

“Do something not perfectly.”

And when I tell them to put as much as themselves into the work as they can, what I am saying is:

“You are not perfect, you will never be perfect, but you are perfectly you, and there will never be another one of you in the history of any universe.”

Life is meaningless; thus, we give it meaning by doing stuff. Stuff that nobody else can do.

Doing something won’t always feel better than doing nothing, at least not in the moment. But feeling something, anything, is always better than feeling nothing.

Yeah, even feeling anxiety.

So this is your reminder to write today. And by write I mean — well, you know what I mean.

FallCon XL 2021

September 25th, 2021

“Return of the Mack” played on the radio on my way home. That’ll be important later.

FallCon XL was today and I just want to say THANK YOU with the full power of my caps lock to everyone I met, saw, or saw again today (and to the staff who made it all happen). You made today one of the most successful convention days I have ever had in every sense of the word and I am just so full of gratitude for you.

So much happened today, some of which I’d love to write more clearly about in the future, and it was just so joyful to be in a big room full of nerds just like me, who were clearly ready and hungry for this.

If you’re new here: welcome. I hope you stay a while. If you’ve been here since we got started: you know this all exists because of you.

When “Return of the Mack” started playing on the radio, it took me back to when I was kid growing up in Faribault. If you would have told him that one day he would not only be hanging out with some of the most talented people on the planet, but be a part of their community, he wouldn’t have believed you.

He would have thought he wasn’t good enough.

Thank you for reminding that kid he was wrong. This timeline can be so dang beautiful.

All my love.

Conned

September 24th, 2021

Tomorrow is FallCon XL at the Minnesota State Fairgrounds; it’ll be the first convention I’m participating in since February of LAST year, and I could not be more excited.

It had me thinking about my first convention as a creator, and the first comic book of mine I ever sold.

It was Fan Fusion at the Xcel Center back in the summer of 2018. I’ve done a lot of contests at my tables; they’re a fun way to start conversations and set yourself apart from other people, especially if you don’t have a lot of work to sell.

The contest for that con was “Name That Dog!” In The Flying Squirrel #1, Ashley has a dog whom he never refers to by name, so I thought it would be neat if I gave people the opportunity to give me suggestions. If, after the weekend was over and I looked at all the entries, I chose the name they gave me, I would use it in The Weirdos and send them a free copy of my comic book.

Simple rules, right? I explained them hundreds of times over the course of the weekend and received as many submissions.

I hadn’t sold a single comic when a girl walked up and I told her about the contest. She thought it was cool, filled out the entry, dropped it in the box, and then picked up a copy of The Flying Squirrel #1… and just walked away with it.

It happened so fast and I was so confused that I didn’t say anything, nor had the wherewithal to get up and track her down.

And so it goes that the first comic book I ever sold at a convention was actually stolen from my table in broad daylight as I sat there smiling like an idiot.

I hope she liked the book.

See you tomorrow.